how to get my husband on my side chapter 1

Chapter 1: Understanding the Importance of Communication for Building a Strong Relationship

Marriage is a union of two individuals who have decided to share their lives together. However, maintaining a harmonious relationship may not always be easy. There will be moments of disagreements and misunderstandings that can lead to feeling like you’re on opposing teams. In this article, we will delve into the ways you can get your husband on your side and work together as a team.

One of the foundations of a successful marriage is communication. It is the ability to express your thoughts, feelings, and opinions effectively, as well as being able to listen to your partner. Communication helps to solve problems, settle disagreements, and maintain a healthy relationship. Without communication, misunderstandings can arise that can lead to resentment, frustration, and ultimately the breakdown of the relationship.

Communication is a two-way street, so both partners need to make an effort to communicate in a positive manner. However, it is common for couples to experience communication breakdowns when they struggle to understand each other’s messages. This can happen when one partner feels that they are not being heard or when they feel like they are being misunderstood.

When a couple faces challenges, most wives’ first reaction is to defend her position and to make her husband understand her perspective. However, taking a defensive approach can make things worse and could lead to misunderstandings. Instead, it’s important to try to understand your husband’s perspective and try to find common ground.

So how can you effectively communicate with your husband and get him on your side? Here are some tips:

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1. Take responsibility for your communication

Communication between couples is a two-way street, and both partners need to take responsibility for their part in the communication. This means acknowledging your role in the communication breakdown and striving to improve the way you interact with your husband.

2. Be clear and concise

Being clear and concise in your communication is important, particularly when discussing important issues or when you want your husband to understand your perspective. Use simple language and avoid using jargon or complex terms that could be confusing.

3. Listen actively

Active listening involves fully concentrating on what your husband is saying, rather than just waiting for your turn to speak. It involves clarifying any misunderstandings and responding appropriately to the information presented.

4. Respect your husband’s perspective

It’s important to listen to and respect your husband’s perspective. You may not agree with him but it’s important to give him the opportunity to express himself without interrupting or making judgements.

5. Avoid negative communication

Negative communication, such as criticism, blame, and sarcasm can make communication ineffective and can lead to even more misunderstandings. Try to avoid these negative communication habits and strive to adopt positive communication techniques instead.

Q: Can lack of communication lead to divorce?
A: Yes, lack of communication can lead to divorce as it can lead to misunderstandings and resentment, which can ultimately damage the relationship beyond repair.

Q: How can we improve communication in our relationship?
A: Some ways you can improve communication in your relationship include actively listening, being clear and concise, respecting each other’s perspectives, avoiding negative communication, and seeking the help of a professional counselor.

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Q: What are some common communication barriers in relationships?
A: Some common communication barriers in relationships include defensiveness, negative communication, misunderstandings, and lack of active listening.

Q: How can I express my feelings without making my husband defensive?
A: One way to express your feelings without making your husband defensive is to use “I” statements instead of “you” statements. For example, instead of saying “you never listen to me”, you could say “I feel unheard and frustrated when I don’t feel like you’re listening to me”. This will help your husband feel less attacked and more receptive to listening to your feelings.

Q: Why is communication important in marriage?
A: Communication is important in marriage as it helps to maintain a healthy relationship, solve problems, and settle disagreements. It also helps to build trust and understanding between partners, which are essential for a successful and happy marriage.


Communication is the foundation of a healthy and happy marriage, and getting your husband on your side involves effective communication. By actively listening to your husband, being clear and concise in your communication, respecting his perspective, avoiding negative communication, and taking responsibility for your part in the communication, you can build a strong and positive relationship. Remember that communication is a two-way street, so both partners need to make an effort to communicate effectively to maintain a happy and long-lasting relationship.

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